As I reflect back on this week I would love to share what I learned and focused on. I read Larry R. Lawrence's talk 'What Lack I Yet?' talk he gave.
He said, "The journey of discipleship is not an easy one. It has been called a “course of steady improvement.” As we travel along that strait and narrow path, the Spirit continually challenges us to be better and to climb higher. The Holy Ghost makes an ideal traveling companion. If we are humble and teachable, He will take us by the hand and lead us home.
However, we need to ask the Lord for directions along the way. We have to ask some difficult questions, like “What do I need to change?” “How can I improve?” “What weakness needs strengthening?”
As a missionary I've recognized that my weaknesses and faults have been made very apparent. It's a normal part of coming unto him. ether 12:27- "And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them." My stubborn opinion and not always so positive attitude and many other things have made themselves very apparent to me. The reality of where I was and where I was trying to get was not lining up. The ever so straight path just got a little narrower. I was not expecting all this to be shown. I wasn't expecting to be having companionship inventories only to recognize how much my weaknesses got in the way of the Lord's way. I have to tell you that this journey to Christ is humbling. It's not for the prideful. It's not for the wicked. It's not for the people who want it easy. I recognized if I was going to let my mission affect me-mold and shape me- I was going to have to be honest with myself. It was discouraging at first. I remember how badly I didn't want to face or change the ways I felt comfortable in. Or how people expected me to be. I didn't want to step into this unknown state of mind that felt ever so uncomfortable at times. I felt like I was denying myself of who I was. I want to share that who you are right now is not perfect. Don't be frustrated with yourself. Don't think that it's too long of a journey to change. for it's 'by small and simple things that great things come to pass.' Only now have I come to realize how far I am from where I want to be. Only now have I really came to recognize and appreciate the suffering the Christ did for me in the Garden of Gethsemane, because it was a lot.
I know that's a lot. But I just want to share that as we start our journey of change into that beautiful beloved Child of God we are, it's not going to be easy. How can we expect it to be easy when it never was easy for our savior Jesus Christ. Humility is a Christlike attribute I hope I can continually strive to develop. It's what brings the changes.
I love you all. I pray for you all. I support you all. Remember where we are going and who we are going to face that judgement day. Remember we won't be able to say. 'you don't understand.'
and I leave that with you in the sacred name of the beloved son, who provides a way for us to obtain this eternal joy he has ready for us, Jesus Christ, Amen.